Daring to be....as a minister of God

Paul Fromont has an interesting post (29.10.10) in which he quotes at reasonable length from a reflection by the Anglican writer, Monica Furlong (1930-2003). In this reflection she responds to the statement:“I want priests who dare to be…” Some of what she says will strike a chord, some may upset, some may concern ministers deeply. Here's the start of the reflection....

“[Priest’s, ministers, pastors] are in for a growing loneliness, of being misunderstood. I suggest that this will only be endurable if they expect this, understand the reasons for it, and do not cast too many envious glances over their shoulders at the circumstances of their predecessors.

I am clear about what I want from the clergy. I want them to be people who can, by their own happiness and contentment challenge my ideas about status, success and money and so teach me how to live more independently of such drugs.

I want them to be people who can dare, as I do not dare, and as few of my contemporaries dare to refuse to work flat out and to refuse to work more strenuously than me.

Read more here...

Theology of self-care

Roy Oswald's book, Clergy Self-Care, begins by looking at the theology of health/wellness. A colleague provided the following notes in relation to this section of the book:

• God is omnipotent and omnipresent, ministers are not!

• God in Christ has done all that is necessary to redeem the world. Ministers do not need to save the world again.

• Mission and ministry belong to whole Body of Christ; a communal activity. Ministry does not belong solely to the Minister.

• Ministry should be a response to an experience of the grace of God. However motives can become distorted and ministry can flow from guilt or the seeking of personal fulfillment.

• Ministers are created beings, and with all humanity have limitations and weaknesses.

• Human beings are responsible for the stewardship of God’s world and themselves.

• God has given a model of self-care in observing the sacred rhythm of work and rest, the Sabbath. Jesus provides a model of doing ministry and taking care of himself; a balance of work and rest.

• Ministers need to learn that to be a person of compassion; we must not to be strung out with every human need that comes along.

• The biblical view of human beings is that the body, heart, soul and mind are all interconnected, parts of our whole being.

On being a new minister

There's an excellent post on the Per Crucem ad Lucem site today, entitled: Pastors aren't Prophets - some unsolicited advice for newly-minted ministers. It's by Rick Floyd.

In it he discusses (amongst other things) the need for ministers to gain the respect of their congregation by being a faithful pastor to the people day in and day out - only then can you speak prophetically to them, and have them listen.

You need to be aware that in spite of all our calls for self-care and avoiding burnout, a minister's job is never going to consist of a forty-hour week, with no evening/night calls or weekend work. It's truly a full-time job...though that doesn't mean you mustn't take any time off. As he writes:

One of the modern heresies (but by no means the only one) of the contemporary mainline church, is that you can have something akin to a normal 40 hour a week professional life and be a faithful pastor. It isn’t true. A pastor’s life, and the life of the pastor’s family is necessarily involved in the community of their congregation in season and out of season. Sometimes, even often, it is wonderful; other times it isn’t. That’s the way it goes. It isn’t the Canyon Ranch spa. I often say being a pastor is the best vocation there is, but perhaps the worst job. If you are not called to it, it is something you really don’t want to do.

And a little later:

One of the things I learned was that you have to love your congregants, even the unlovable, of which there are far too many, and who take up a good deal of your time. If and when you find yourself loving them, you know you are on your way to really being a pastor. Some of them you will just never learn to love, and you have to turn them over to God, who does.

Floyd probably packs more wisdom into this one article than you'll find in many a day. Essential reading.

Leaders keeping on learning

In the book, Supervision in the Helping Professions, the authors discuss the need to continue to learn and flourish in your work environment. Since this relates to National Mission's ongoing concern for the health of ministers and leaders in the church, I thought I'd add here a couple of lists they include in their chapter on the topic (notes in brackets are mine).

Firstly, in relation to being effective at work:

1. Be in love with learning. Stay at your learning edge and have a learning project.

2. Be clear about your learning style and keep expanding it. [Knowing your learning style helps you be sure that you're learning at your own pace, not at the pace of others.]

3. Attend to your emotional well-being.

4. Increase your capacity to relate to and engage with others. [They suggest going outside your comfort zone of people you relate to easily.]

5. Attend to your physical well-being - diet, exercise, sleep, breaks. [Days off!]

6. Have a personal or spiritual practice. [For Christian leaders, this means not neglecting those spiritual disciplines - they're often one of the first things to fall off this sort of a list.]

7. Find a group of good co-learners/fellow travellers. [People who encourage you - people who can mentor you.]

The second list will appear in a separate post.

Simple approaches to wellbeing

In the October edition of In Touch, the newsletter put out by the Mental Health Foundation of NZ, five ways to improve your wellbeing were noted. Wellbeing and wellness are much of our focus here at National Mission, and so I'm passing on these five points (with a few of my own comments in brackets).

They begin by saying that wellbeing is a state of feeling good and functioning well. The five ways to wellbeing - all simple, straightforward approaches - are as follows:

1. Connect: develop your relationships with friends, family, colleagues and neighbours. These connections support you and enrich your life. [Tapu Misa wrote about this aspect of health in one of her recent columns.]

2. Give: do something for a friend or stranger and see yourself and your happiness as linked to the wider community. [Think of the 'Pay it Forward' approach]

3. Take notice: be aware of the world around you and see the beauty in [both] everyday and unusual things - reflecting on them helps you appreciate what matters to you. [Note the word reflecting: taking notice takes time.]

4. Learn: try something new or rediscover an old interest, or take on a new responsibility or challenge. Learning makes you more confident and can be fun.

5. Be active: physical activity helps you to feel good so find something that you enjoy and that suits your personality. [The biggest difficulty with this is that when you feel down, it's hard to get moving in physical activity, even something as simple as going for a walk. Having someone else to do the activity with you makes a huge difference. The same applies to point 4.]

Clergy Self-Care?

I do not think clergy need more lectures about self-care.

It seems that at every ordination or installation service I attend there is a charge given about clergy self care. One minister stands up and tells another minister that they know they are about to work themselves to death, so resist the temptation. “Take your day off…set boundaries…don’t try to be all things to all people.” All this is done in front of an audience of lay people who are supposed to be impressed that we clergy would need such a lecture. It has become a cliché, and seems to have trumped prophecy, theology and the love of Jesus.

Lillian Daniel begins a short post on clergy self-care in the above fashion. Is she right about what she's saying: do clergy make more noise about self-care than they do about actually achieving anything in this area? Are clergy worse off than the average working person? Do you think her answers to the question are the right ones? Read the post and let me know.

Wellness - from a Maori writer's perspective

In a video on the Perspectives on Wellbeing page of the Mental Health Foundation of NZ's website, Maori language scholar and author Ruth Makuini Tai talks about finding out who you really are - by leaving behind the 'other' voices in your life, as well as providing new insights into the meaning of 'aroha' and the simple greeting 'kia ora' (which turns out to say considerably more in those six letters than you'd think).

The video runs for a couple of minutes, maybe three, and Ruth packs a good deal into that short space of time. I can't link directly to the video, because it's not a You Tube-type, so here's the address.

On the same page, there's another video, this time by Judi Clements, in which she discusses the five ways everyone can support their own wellbeing and that of the world around them, including family, friends, colleagues and the wider community. The five ways are connecting, being active, taking notice, learning and giving.

RID website

Two years ago researchers from the University of Otago's Injury Prevention Research Unit set up the University of Otago depression website Rid - Recovery via the Internet from Depression . It started to accept participants about a year ago.

The site offers people a series of interactive exercises and mental health surveys, as well as information on where to access face-to-face or telephone counselling, and other mental health services.

The lead researcher, Dr Shyamala Nada-Raja said that researchers were happy with the number of participants enrolled so far, but the trial still needed a total of 700 participants to be statistically valid. 660 were enrolled so far, and she hoped to have another 40 within the next couple of weeks, after which enrolments would be closed.

660 people enrolled so far
Participants range in age from 18-70
30% of participants men; 20% new migrants 16% of participants live in rural areas
14% of participants have a physical disability
About 50% of participants are also receiving treatment elsewhere for anxiety or depression
About 50% of participants say their anxiety or depression relates to an underlying physical problem such as chronic pain

adapted from an article in the Otago Daily Times, Tuesday Oct 6th, 2009

Free Webinar

We've talked about webinars on here before (most recently, Lynne Baab's one that's coming up soon), and we've just been made aware of one that's happening on Wednesday, Sept 23, from 2 pm - 3 pm. (That's Eastern Standard Time, in the US, and according to a handy little link on the registration page, it'll be 6 am - 7 am in the morning here in New Zealand, on Thursday the 24th.)

This webinar is being run by US author, Mary Ellen Copeland, who's written extensively in the mental health area. She's the author of WRAP (Wellness Recovery Action Plan). This is a simple approach to self-help for those struggling with wellness; it identifies personal resources that you can use to improve recovery.

In this webinar she'll describe concrete techniques for identifying wellness tools and helpful ideas that can be used when working with others who are in need of wellness.

The webinar will also include a preview of Mary Ellen's online course, 'Wellness Tools' (I think that's called: never let a moment pass when you might be marketing!)

Registration page is here.
In case you didn't notice the heading - this is a FREE webinar.

Sheds, Streets and Charity

I wrote about the Men's Sheds movement in Australia a few posts back. I didn't know that the movement had reached New Zealand as well, so was pleasantly surprised to read in the paper this week that a second Shed was just up and running. They're actually calling them "Blokes' Sheds" here, so it may be an uptake of the idea rather than an offshoot of it.

The first Dunedin shed was established at Taieri Airport about a year ago (Taieri Airport now being a place where only little planes take off from), and the second shed is in the grounds of the Kings High School. It goes by the name of the South Dunedin Blokes' Shed, and officially opens on Saturday the 5th Sept, 2009. (Apparently Alexandra is also in the process of setting up a Blokes' Shed and Wellington is in on the act too.) You can see a video from Channel 9 about the Taieri Blokes' Shed here.

On another front, a group called Living Streets Dunedin is initiating the concept of making Dunedin streets more pleasant for pedestrians through "highlighting the good, the bad and the ugly in their walking environment." This sounds a little like the idea of getting to know your community, which Flagstaff Parish began a year or so ago.

And who says charity is dead? A young girl, Grace Hughes, was featured on television in July and in the Otago Daily Times in August. She has an inability to eat, and could be helped by treatment at a hospital in Austria. As the Star newspaper reports: Since then the family has been inundated with offers of help.

Cracked Pots

While trying to track down a book called The Cracked Pot, the state of today’s Anglican parish clergy, by Yvonne Warren, I came across an article from 2007 on the Church Times archives, called What Price Priesthood? by Rachel Harden.

It discusses clergy burnout, stress, the difficulties of being ill and then having to recover within the parish, long hours with little time off, and other problems of ministry. Yvonne Warren, herself the wife of a clergyman for 40 years, notes that the Church in the 21st century is experiencing a cataclysmic time of change, with huge implications, and says, “This has affected patterns of ministry more than most, and many clergy are feeling the impact of this, not just in terms of workload, but in their sense of frustration and feeling of increasing irrelevance in a largely secularised society.”

Another book is mentioned in the article: Clergy Burnout: Recovering from the 70-hour work week. . . and other self-defeating practices by Fred Lehr. Lehr had a terrible time saying “no”, and loved feeling needed. “In reality it exhausted me, and I hated constantly being caught between my family and my congregation. I found myself helplessly falling in what we call burnout.” He sought help, and used his experience to work on a specialised treatment programme.

The Society of Martha and Mary produced a report in 2002 called, Affirmation and Accountability. In it they called on dioceses and other church structures to provide more constructive solutions for clergy who were on stress-related sick leave.

The article is fairly long, but well worth checking out. There are several personal statements at the end from people who have been through burnout and similar struggles.

Unfortunately, The Cracked Pot is now out of print, and only available through Print on Demand at the publishers, Kevin Mayhew. Affirmation and Accountability is also hard to get hold of in NZ (there is one copy, at the Kinder Library). Clergy Burnout is more readily available.

Presenteeism

In the August edition of NZ Management, there’s a one page article called, Why Health = Wealth. It's written by Peter Tynan.
We’re all familiar with the word, absenteeism, but in this article a similar word, presenteeism, is introduced. It relates to people who come to work sick, and the impact on productivity associated with having them there in that state. The biggest cost to businesses in relation to their staffs’ poor health is presenteeism.
It’s not a matter of making sure people stay away when they’re unwell, but ensuring that people are more healthy in general. According to some stats, 70% of workers have a “state of health equivalent to an older person, with 20% rated as having the health of someone a decade older. Nearly a third were rated as obese while stress levels were poor to bad for 43%.” As recession stress only adds to ill-health.
At present it’s estimated that “two thirds of New Zealand companies offer employees health and wellness interventions. “ But further investment in this area is needed, particularly as the workforce ages.

Wellness....or not

These figures were quoted in a review on Amazon.com for the book, Mad Church Disease
Some recent statistics from The Fuller Institute, George Barna, and Pastoral Care Inc.

90% of the pastors report working between 55 to 75 hours per week.

80% believe pastoral ministry has negatively affected their families. Many pastor's children do not attend church now because of what the church has done to their parents.

33% state that being in the ministry is an outright hazard to their family.

90% feel they are inadequately trained to cope with the ministry demands and 50% feel unable to meet the demands of the job.

70% say they have a lower self-image now than when they first started.

70% do not have someone they consider a close friend.

40% report serious conflict with a parishioner at least once a month.

33% confess having involved in inappropriate sexual behavior with someone in the church .

50% have considered leaving the ministry in the last months.

50% of the ministers starting out will not last 5 years.

94% of clergy families feel the pressures of the pastor's ministry.

The profession of "Pastor" is near the bottom of a survey of the most-respected professions, just above "car salesman".

Over 4,000 churches closed in America last year.

Over 1,700 pastors left the ministry every month last year.

Over 1,300 pastors were terminated by the local church each month, many without cause.

Over 3,500 people a day left the church last year, over 1.25 million people.

This shows that there's all the more need for an emphasis on Wellness amongst ministers and their families. If it's happening there, it's happening here (in fact we know it's happening here).

Unfairness

For the next couple of months, the relatively new New Zealand site, Like Minds, Like Mine is focusing on the topic of unfairness in relation to people who've been discriminated against because of their mental illness. The video below, which features Samoan-born Rev. Imoa Setefano is the one that is currently showing, and hopefully will continue to be available by the You Tube link.



There are several other profiles on the site, and the site is worth visiting for its other features too.

Killing the pastor

Do we only want pastors and teachers? What about evangelists, apostles, prophets? Or are people with these gifts too scary to have in the average church? Won't the evangelists be forever telling us to get out and evangelise? Won't the apostles be demanding we start up a new church every five minutes? Won't the prophets come to church dressed in weird garb and shouting loudly?
Len, on the New Reformation blog, has written:
Alan Roxburgh and others argue that the sola pastora (single pastor) model of church has not only sapped the missional impulse from the church, it has cast many pastors into relative isolation. Roxburgh claims that this model, with its focus on one dominant, usually shepherd-type leader, is “killing pastors,” leading to “terrible discouragement and loneliness, and creating a deep sense of personal failure.”
He goes on to discuss this issue, but I want just to mention that wellness in ministers these days is one of the great plagues of society, far worse than swine-flu, far worse than any pandemic we've supposedly known in recent decades. We have to change. Churches have to take responsibility for leadership, not just leave it all to one over-burdened man.

Fighting Shadows

Fighting Shadows: Self-Stigma And Mental Illness: Whawhai Atu te Whakamâ Hihira incorporates the experiences of 76 men and women from around the country; including Pakeha, Maori, Pasifika, Chinese, young people and refugees.
This study, produced by the Mental Health Foundation was launched on 9th July, 2008. It shows that "negative messages about mental illness in society shape and reinforce attitudes people hold toward themselves,” said Judi Clements, Chief Executive of the Mental Health Foundation of New Zealand. “These attitudes hold people back from full participation in society, and create a cycle of internalised stigma, or ‘self-stigma’"
Participants in the study described experiences of isolation, self-doubt, rejection by family and peers, and pessimism about their prospects of recovery.
However, participants also identified actions or ‘circuit-breakers’ to counter discrimination and negative thought patterns. These included: more visibility of people with mental illness, building peer support networks, affirming human rights, challenging negative attitudes, and encouraging mental health services to focus on recovery.
The full report can be read online. It's also available in book form, from the Mental Health Foundation.

Wellness and overwork

I was alerted to the following quote by . It comes from an article on the site called RethinkingMission.org. It was written by Neil Richardson.

"Finally, a more personal comment is about re-connecting with our deepest selves. In the first year of my first circuit appointment I had to take some time off through overwork, and I guess most of us battle with diaries which are too crowded for our own good. The New Testament encourages us to distinguish those pressures we are under which come either from inside ourselves or from other people, and those pressures which simply go with the territory of being a disciple and a presbyter or deacon in the Church of God. About those pressures the New Testament is extraordinarily positive; ‘in all these things, we are more than conquerors’ (Romans 8.37). But we need to distinguish the pressures which are inseparable from our vocation from those which are not. So I end with part of a letter written by Bernard of Clairvaux:

‘How long can you be like a spirit that goes out and never comes home again? How long can you give everyone else your attention – but not give yourself any? Yes, if people treat themselves badly, how can they be good for anyone else? So think on this: give yourself some space. I’m not saying, Do that all the time. I’m not saying, Do it often. But I am saying Keep on doing it, again and again. Be there for yourself, in the same way that you are available to everyone else – or at least be there for yourself when everyone else has gone’. (Quoted in Seeing Christ in Others, ed. Geoffrey Duncan, Canterbury Press 2002, p.184).

Incidentally, this blog has suffered a little from lack of posts over the last couple of weeks due to preparations for the Presbyterian General Assembly, which took place from the 2nd Oct till today (the 6th). For those interested in catching up with what's been happening there, you can read the daily reports on the PCANZ Presbyterian website.

Leading with a Limp

One of the books that Steve Graham focused on in his talks to the South Island Pastors' Conference was Dan Allender's book, Leading with a Limp, which came out in 2006. The book looks at the fact that many leaders have suffered, or need to suffer, brokenness, before they can lead others: 'we achieve leadership by falling off our throne.'
The book deals with five areas: crisis, complexity, betrayal, loneliness and weariness. All of which should sound familiar to most leaders!
The issue is how we deal with these areas, whether with a typically ineffective response or by finding options to bring about an effective solution. In each case Allender shows that a leader can either fall into an ineffective area, or tip over into one that leads to a positive outcome. For example, with the area of crisis, the leader can either drop into cowardice, or into courage. With the latter he can then move on into confidence in God that whatever he or she is doing it no longer needs to impress others.
That last paragraph doesn't by any means do justice to the way Allender treats the topic (or the way Steve re-presented it), but it may just give you a taster.
Here are some comments about the book:
“There are good books on leadership, but this one is profound. It is better than a ‘how to do it’ book; this is a ‘how to be it’ book for leaders. Dan Allender offers serious wisdom rather than simple platitudes.”
–Mark Sanborn
“After reading this book, the first two words out of my mouth were ‘At last!’ Amid a deluge of spiritual gifts inventories, at last there is someone who understands how God’s strength is made perfect in our imperfections. At last someone has brought spiritual strengths and spiritual weaknesses into conversation. For Dan Allender, the limp is a limpid way of walking that leads into the very presence of God.”
–Leonard Sweet
“Leading with a Limp is not your basic, cafeteria-brand manual on how to ‘do’ leadership. It is a call to openly face your shortcomings as a leader. Dan Allender reminds us that our greatest asset as leaders is not our competence but the courage to name and deal with our frailties and imperfections.”
–Dr. Crawford W. Loritts, Jr

Men and Depression

One of the areas National Mission Office has been concerned with is the health of Presbyterian ministers around the country. Ministers can suffer from burn-out, depression and the symptoms that go with these. And often they feel forced to keep on keeping on because ministers are supposed to be capable people.

Male depression is only just beginning to be regarded as a prime source of suicide amongst men in mid-life - as recent tv ads will have indicated.

Via an article in the magazine, Grapevine, I've just become aware of a site called MenAlive.com. It focuses on depression, mid-life crises, irritable male syndrome (that's right, no typo there), and other related issues.

It's an American site, but it has a links page that is global in its range. And quite apart from that, depression is common to mankind (and womankind, or course!)