Tapu Misa, the NZ Herald columnist, begins her latest column with these words:
When I was a younger mother of three preschoolers, doing a barely reasonable job, my daughter's preschool gave her a book called How To Really Love Your Child.
At the time I wasn't sure whether to feel offended (how dare they suggest I needed lessons in how to love my child?) or embarrassed (how did they know I needed lessons in how to love my child?). I found out later that the preschool gave copies to everyone - for good reason.
The author, American psychiatrist Dr Ross Campbell, was right. Most parents need lessons in how to love, especially (but not only) if they haven't been loved themselves.
Misa goes on to discuss how many parents who abuse their children have never know love in their own childhoods, and how there's a slow but sure move towards teaching people to love their kids, in New Zealand.
Campbell's book was first published in 1977, and has sold continuously since. It has been translated in 20 languages, including Russian. It was one of our 'staples' when I worked in the bookstore.
Forgive the lack of pictures in recent posts: Google is having some issue with uploading them.
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