The joys of denominationalism

All the Christian denominations were having a big ecumenical meeting in a church. Suddenly, lightning struck and the church caught on fire!

* The Methodists gathered in a corner and prayed for the fire to go out.
* The Baptists gathered in a different corner and prayed for rain.
* The Quakers gathered for silent meditation on the many benefits of fire.
* The Lutherans nailed a list of the ninety-five evils of fire to the church door.
* The Catholics passed the collection plate a second and third time to pay for the damage.
* The Episcopalians gathered up their incense and formed a dignified processional out the door.
* The Fundamentalists declared that the fire was God’s just wrath on everybody else.
* The Presbyterians elected a chairperson to appoint a committee to study the problem.
* And the United Church people shouted “Everyone for themselves!” and ran for the doors.

Found on Ralph Milton's ezine, Rumours, which has just announced that it's going to be producing its final edition at Easter.

Recently, Kevin Kelly of Wired magazine discussed the next 1,000 years of Christianity.
There's a summary by Kent Shaffer of what he said on the neoleader blog.
To give you a taste of what he said here's his list of possible future events...some of which might be tongue-in-cheek

• At the rate that new Christian denominations are growing, there could be 260,000 denominations by 2100.
• Mormons are growing fast. What if they become the world majority?
• The Amish are also growing fast. Could the world become Neo-Amish?
• Around 2050, will be the first time in history where we have doubled the world population but are expectedly to dramatically decrease it.
• What happens when robots with artificial intelligence say, “I too am a child of God?”
• Transhumanity
• With genetic engineering, will we remain one species or many?
• Wikipedia does not work in theory but in practice. What about Wikichurch?
• Christianity becomes hip.
• Purple Christians (a mix of Democrats and Republicans)
• Islam in Europe

You can check out the original half-hour video here.

Gone for Good?

We wrote about Alan Jamieson's books a few posts ago. Another title that complements his thinking is this one, from the UK.

Gone for Good?: Church Leaving and Returning in the 21st Century, by Leslie Francis and Philip Richter.

In their thought-provoking analysis, Francis and Richter provide a detailed account of the different reasons behind church leaving. They also identify how some church leavers can be converted more easily than others into becoming church returners. The authors look at why many people are disillusioned with the church, while for others questions are around matters of teaching, style of worship or incompatibility of lifestyle. For others, the costs of being involved in the church are too high, for others there are issues about change or lack of it.

Leslie Francis and Philip Richter have evaluated over 7000 telephone interviews and more than 900 questionnaires completed by people who have left churches of different Christian denominations. They provide powerful and authoritative insights into what church leavers really think about the church and into who is likely to return and who is likely to stay away.
Epworth Press 2007