Croucher retreats

Rowland Croucher writes in an email today:

For the first time in twenty years, I'm taking an extended sabbatical. I won't be answering the phone, but will occasionally check emails and Facebook for anything needing urgent attention.

What will I do? First, spend some time in solitude and prayer. I'm booking into a Retreat centre to do that - and will probably return there - or to other solitary places - from time to time.

If I get a green light (from God!), I'm probably going to write a Blog later in this sabbatical, then maybe a book (which will include some of your helpful feedback), on the Top Ten (?) Questions pastors ask: The key six these days relate to Stress/Burnout, Homosexuality, Marriage/Relationship issues, Hermeneutics (The Bible: Fundamentalism vs Jesus Seminar etc.), Islam, Effective Leadership and Conflict Resolution - a sort of updated series of 'Grid' leadership articles, like we produced with the help of World Vision back in the 80s and early 90s.

Note the item that's first on his Top Ten Questions.

Faith from different angles

Just for a bit of a laugh check out Steve Martin's 'Atheists don't have no songs' video. (Incidentally, his movie, Leap of Faith, from 1992, still stands as a surprisingly good 'discussion' about faith, real and fake.)

On another tack, I received an email from Rowland Croucher yesterday in which he explains how an introvert (like him) uses Facebook. If you're not already a Facebook user, you won't be able to access his page - and you may not want to - but he provides some examples of ways in which he's started discussions recently, all of which have got people thinking about faith, and the spiritual dimension of life. It's another positive way of using what some people think of as useless Internet flotsam and jetsam. Here's the list:

* What does one say to a sad-looking lady, who obviously has some mental health issues, who stops you in a shopping mall and asks: 'Excuse me, can I ask you a question? Is there anything wrong with my face?' (She was 'wall-eyed', and she would not have won a 'beauty contest', but... ')??? Two key responses: 'Why not ask why's she's asking?' And: 'Were you looking at her to prompt the question?' (Answer: no: the pedestrian traffic was fairly heavy!).

* If you were to put a brief 'Statement of Faith' together, what would it look like? Here's one I wrote about 20-30 years ago. Should I update it? (http://jmm.aaa.net.au/topics/missions_evangelism?p=8057). Most people picked up on the women/men in leadership section!

* When/what was the last verifiable miracle you witnessed? Then a link to an article about 'Weird Christians' here - http://jmm.aaa.net.au/articles/25441.htm . One response: 'I prayed over a couple in our Church in 1998 who just been told by doctors that they could not have children because of the man having a non-existent sperm count. She fell pregnant within two months and they have three children now. He went for a sperm count check after the first child was born and it still registered zero.'

* Addiction: “Just 'cause you got the monkey off your back doesn't mean the circus has left town.” “You do anything long enough to escape the habit of living until the escape becomes the habit.” “Why is it drug addicts and computer aficionados are both called users?” One response: 'I have a theory that someone who is addicted to self harm is doing it so they can feel. There is a real sense that they are emotionally numbed to the internal pain, there is a need for an external pain source to allow them to feel...'

* (WWJW - What Would Jesus Wear?) - A man has been kicked out of a church in the US - for dressing like Jesus. Neil Thompson dresses up like Jesus and goes to a new church every week. But when he got to St Paul's Church in St Louis, Missouri, police were called and he was asked to leave. Response: 'Obviously Jesus wasn't up on security plans when in the garden of Gethsemane. He was such easy prey to the mob and rejected the offer of a sword. We are so paranoid. Jesus deliver us from our preoccupation with our own safety rather than loving the outside even if he does prove to be our enemy and a threat to our lives. "He who tries to save his life will lose it".'

Straining out camels, logs in the eyes

Rowland Croucher brings good sense to the issue of Muslims in America - and to Americans who berate them - in a short piece that's appeared on his John Mark Ministries website.

He asks the question; What Would Jesus Do Regarding Muslim Americans? You’d Be Surprised.  In this article no one gets off the hook: the logs in one lot of eyes are a darn sight bigger than the splinters in the others - and vice versa. 

A couple of paragraphs from the piece: 

Just as He took on devout figures in the Jewish tradition, He would ask tough questions about whether many devout Muslims, with their myriad and sometimes cumbersome rules and rituals, are straining out gnats while swallowing camels. He would challenge viewpoints and smash many precious idols and a priori assumptions. He would, in short, tick some people off.


But He would also be frank with those of His followers who ignore His command to love and bless and be patient with outsiders. He would point out that, if someone truly is their enemy, that merely triggers their special duty to bless enemies rather than persecute them. He would remind His believers that it’s only by their doing so that they mark themselves as being a part of His distinctive Kingdom.

Highly recommended...

Going (or not going) on a retreat

Over the holiday weekend I read an article on Rowland Croucher's site regarding the retreats he does with individuals. I baulked at the price of these - $1000AU - until I noticed that he doesn't take any of this money; it's sent onto a charity that works in both Victoria, Aus. and Thailand. You might still think $1000 is a lot of money for having six hours worth of a listening ear; it may depend on how much your spiritual health requires such an ear.

However, the price isn't really the interesting part of this article, which is divided up into several sections. Firstly, Rowland lays out an FAQ which gives answers to most of the questions you'd be likely to ask initially, and gives you an idea of the way in which the retreat is conducted. "Usually, the retreat lasts from late afternoon (about 4.30 pm, then a couple of hours over dinner) one day, and resumes about 9.30 to about noon the following day. Bring your walking shoes!" So it's not a long period of time, and it's definitely not silent. This is a talking/walking retreat - and you, as the retreatant, will do most of the talking. It's a spiritual health check-up, basically, which is not necessarily the same as having a spiritual advisor.

The second section of the article covers the 19 questions that might be covered during the retreat. Rowland helpfully provides these so that you can think about them yourself without necessarily visiting him. (Though obviously it would help to have someone else to think them through with.) Spending some time over a few weeks reflecting on these questions would help most people's spiritual health, I suspect, as long as they gave themselves some room to think about the 'answers.'

The third section is a moving story written by a woman who did the retreat at some point. She affirms Rowland's earlier comment that: a lot of male problems go back to inadequate fathering or initiation into manhood. A lot of women's problems go back to their non-affirmation by fathers etc. There's a second 'story' on a different link.

The fourth section offers a spiritual audit not necessarily covering the same ground as the 19 questions. This would also be a good thing to use in terms of setting aside some time regularly to reflect on your spiritual health.

Print the 19 questions or the spiritual audit out - and take some time to use one or the other.

The photo by Jessica Charlesworth is entitled Two Men Walking Seriously, a great title in view of the subject matter in this post.

Leaders Who Last

Rowland Croucher has placed a review of this book by Margaret J. Marcuson on Facebook. What follows is just a part of the review.

Here’s one of the best little (150 pages) books on pastoral leadership with an American mainline church /Alban Institute flavour to emerge in the last decade.

They say every sermon/book should be summarizable in one sentence. Here’s mine for this one: ‘Your pastoral leadership style/conflicts can’t be understood apart from your family-of-origin experiences; so be patient: most changes in a pastor’s approach and a congregation’s responsiveness will take time and sensitivity to that church’s history as well.’

Margaret’s a Baptist, but as a non-fundamentalist Baptist myself, I hasten to add that the people she quotes and the ideas she espouses indicate that she’s a ‘broad church Baptist’ (yes, some of us do actually exist!).

Some of her (and her professional friends’) wisdom:

• When we are less dependent on the approval of others we can be more effective in our ministry (p. 6)

• Carrying other people, until we can’t do it any longer, is the real source of burnout, not overwork (11). We can be the most help by giving people space to find creative solutions to their own struggles (17). Identify who in your family you were trained to rescue so as not to mistake legitimate professional helping with illegitimate family rescuing – which is inevitably tied to unhealthy ways of trying to feel good about oneself (18-19).

• Many clergy are oldest children: they learn early to over-function in relation to others, to take responsibility for them (34-5). Of course not all that we learnt from our families is negative. Ask: ‘What gifts did your parents give you?’ (36). An initial step in looking at our family story is to create a family genogram (37). And remember: the problems with parents is that they had parents (46).

• Clarifying your vocation: Where do I want to go? What energizes me? What future possibilities do I see? What legacy do I want to leave? Do I know what I love to do? Can I do more of it? What was my original thinking in going into ministry? If I had to write down my ministry purpose in one sentence right this minute, what would I say? (73).

• The person who desperately wants to be liked is never the most popular; the leader who desperately wants others to follow is not the most effective (76)

• Teresa of Avila’s daily prayer: ‘Let nothing disturb you, nothing frighten you; all things are passing, God never changes. Patient endurance attains to all things; who God possesses in nothing is wanting; alone God suffices’ (110).

The excellent final chapter on personal spiritual disciplines includes such classical wisdom as: worship in different places and traditions, go outside, find a spiritual mentor, read Scripture devotionally, not just for your sermon preparation.

At the end of each chapter are some very helpful discussion-starters. The ten questions to ask about your church’s history are brilliant (32). I’d suggest this book as an excellent resource for your pastoral colleagues’ support-group.
Alban Institute 2009

The need for support

And one more piece from the huge Rowland Croucher collection on stress and burnout in ministry. This one was written (originally as a letter) by Wayne Dobratz, Pastor of Trinity Lutheran Church in Hampton, Iowa. I can't tell you how long ago, however, as there doesn't appear to be a date on the article.

He confirms some things Croucher has said in a previous article about the family of origin having a considerable impact on pastors, but also says a couple of other significant things:

Don't stop writing [he's talking to Rowland here] about the need for a small sharing group. We clergy try so hard to hide our own emotional needs all the while attempting to bail out a dozen sinking boats alongside of our own leaky craft. My problem right now is that I left behind just about everything you prescribe when I changed churches more than 4 years ago. Where does a Pastor turn when there is no group of "wounded healers" to which he can turn?

and

The mentor is so very important. I have a friend who is about 20 years older than I. Though he may not fit the exact definition of a mentor, the needed sharing/talking takes place when we are together. Every Pastor needs this.

Supervision for pastors is high on the agenda in New Zealand....but how many are availing themselves of it - or can?

Not angels in disguise

Continuing on with our occasional series of pieces from Rowland Croucher, today's article fits in well with the last post I wrote on pastors being bullied by their congregations.

Croucher's article is entitled: Do Yourself A Favour - Encourage Your Pastor!

We're too often keen to nitpick and complain about our pastors, forgetting that they aren't angels in disguise (and thus superhuman). Nor are they supermen/women whom only kryptonite can touch.

Croucher's article is an A-Z of things to think about in terms of your minister, from Accountability (yours as a congregation member, not his or hers as a pastor) to Zeal - zeal to pick up jobs around the church scene and not leave them to the minister to do....in his or her spare time.

And Y for Yourself is succinct and to the point: If every church member encouraged others as much as you do, what sort of church would it be?

More from Croucher

As promised, here's another article from Rowland Croucher on the issues of stress and burnout amongst ministers. This one begins with a story about a man who had the ability to preach, but always lost his church job through conflict. In the end he was virtually down and out, his wife just managing to make ends meet.

Rowland goes on to look at what helps a pastor/minister last the distance.

Today it's both easier and harder to be a pastor. Easier, because we have more resources to help us - like the World Wide Web for sermon-material (ever used the search-engine Google as a concordance?), more support-groups to encourage and pray for us, better access to the world's practical theology experts, and a higher standard of living, on average, than pastors have ever enjoyed.

But it's also harder. Many of us can identify with the apostle Paul who said, 'Who is equal to such a task?', about his own call to pastoral ministry. These days the expectations of our people are higher - and more likely to be expressed vigorously. Up-front leaders and speakers compete with dynamic personalities on television. There are more 'religious' people not attending churches (in the West) than ever before in history. Our people are likely to be better-educated - and differently-educated than we are. 'One size fits all' doesn't work any more: people are more mobile, and brand-loyalty doesn't work for Generation X'ers (those born since 1965) - or even Baby Boomers (born between 1946 and 1964).

He offers a number of suggestions over several articles (I've only listed the first few here, as the others run comfortably on from the one before.)

1. Jesus as the model for ministry
2. Spiritual formation -keeping on bel
3. Images of Ministry - what is yours?
4. Saint or Pharisee?
5. Keeping the Spiritual Disciplines - this point keeps turning up; is God saying something?!
6. What about the 'Call'?
the rest of the article appears in a second page:
7. Understanding yourself - how much does your family history affect your work?
8. Co-dependency - blaming others for your own faults
9. Mentors and Networks - absolutely essential!

Stress and Burnout in Ministry

I've had a long distance association with Australian Rowland Croucher for a number of years, first when I used to buy his books in for the bookshop I ran, and more recently, with the advent of Facebook, in seeing his regular contributions to that site. I also get a (fairly) regular ezine from him.

In the last couple of days he's put together a short piece in which he compiles the main links to articles on his John Mark Ministries site relating to stress and burnout. Unfortunately, unless you're (a) a member of Facebook, and (b) a 'friend' of Rowland's, you won't be able to access this page.

So, over the next week or two, I'm going to give you links to the various articles he's focusing on. There are some basic ones on stress and burnout as well as pages where he lists still more links - the list goes on and on. (Of course, once you're on the John Mark site, you'll be able to access these articles yourself, although Rowland's made it a bit easier to find some of them.)

Some of these articles aren't new, by any means. Nevertheless, the material in them isn't dated; if anything the problem has got worse since these articles were written.

Here's a good piece for starters. It's written by Rowland, is directly on the topic (Stress And Burnout In Ministry), and talks not only about why pastoral ministry is so stressful, but also offers some basic advice on how to overcome some aspects of the stress.

I like the way he puts one of the recommendations for staying healthy:

2. Take regular time off. You aren't called to work harder than your Creator.

Develop a way of being 'through for the day' (at least most days).
Take your full four weeks' annual leave in one stretch (and make alternative arrangements for weddings, etc.).
Encourage your denomination to include two weeks' extra, all-expenses-paid study leave each year.
On your day/s off, do something very different from what you do the other days. (Wednesday or Thursday is best for preachers - away from the adrenalin-arousing Sundays).
Listen to Spurgeon: 'Repose is as needful to the mind as sleep to the body... If we do not rest, we shall break down. Even the earth must lie fallow and have her Sabbaths, and so must we'.
Jesus said, 'Come apart and rest awhile'. (If you don't rest awhile, you'll soon come apart!).

[Spurgeon should know: he struggled with depression a good deal.]

Take some time off to read this article. If may be a lifesaver!

WHAT DOES A HEALTHY CHURCH LOOK LIKE?

Rowland Croucher, an Australian pastor who writes prolifically on a variety of Church-related topics, and who's the mainstay behind the John Mark Ministries in Oz, has sent me an email in which he links to material on signs of a Healthy Church/Congregation.

The page has only just been created in October 2008, so it's fresh off the block.

Rowland covers a number of areas - justice, spiritual abuse, governance, affirmation of diversity, tolerance of ambiguity, leadership styles and accountability (amongst others) - and each is linked to further material either from the John Mark site or elsewhere.

It may take you a few days to absorb all the material, but it's worth the trip, in my opinion.

The Olympic Creed

Rowland Croucher wrote: A Uniting Church magazine asked me to write something about the Olympic Creed (below). Feel free, my preaching-friends, to steal it if you want!

Who was the American football coach who said: 'Winning or losing is not just a matter of life and death: it's more important than that'? Addiction to winning is not only a capitalist phenomenon, either. Remember past East German and Chinese drug scandals?

The Olympic Creed says: 'The most important thing in the Olympic Games is not to win but to take part, just as the most important thing in life is not the triumph but the struggle. The essential thing is not to have conquered but to have fought well.' Google tells me Pierre de Coubertin got the idea from a speech given by the Bishop of Pennsylvania, Ethelbert Talbot, at a service for Olympic champions during the 1908 London Games.

You can find the rest of this sermon here. If you have problems accessing this site, drop me an email (address on my profile).